Recently On...Netflix

Recently On...Netflix

More than ever we're watching shows and movies online, being stuck at home day in, day out - like Groundhog Day. Here are some interesting documentaries, films and tv shows I've watched on Netflix lately. Maybe you'll find something you like too.

All The Bright Places

This romantic teen-drama is based on the bestselling novel of the same name - about Violet and Theodore, who meet a bit how Rose and Jack meet in Titanic - Violet, potentially about to jump from a bridge, following the grief and loss of her sister, but saved by Theodore before it's too late. Both are struggling with deep emotional scars of their past, but find a sense of healing as they both fall in love with one another. It's an intense story to watch but beautifully done, giving a fresh, true-to-life perspective on the experience of mental illness, grief, and how this impacts relationships. For fans of The Fault In Our Stars or To All The Boys I Loved Before - you may enjoy this!

Miss Americana

I always love getting a behind-the-scenes experience into the life of an artist or a prolific celebrity. I'm not a massive Swift fan but I actually enjoyed this. The documentary delves into the many facets of Taylor Swift's career - from the big decisions and board meetings with her managers and publicists to her more vulnerable side and struggle with her body image. We see the ups and downs of her career in the late 2010s from that Kanye scandal to her dazzling tour costumes and her early rise to stardom as a determined and eager-to-please teenager. I found it to be a very honest look into one of the biggest female pop stars of today and the kind of challenges she faces on a day-to-day basis. If you enjoyed 5 Foot 2 about Lady Gaga, then you may like this too.

Joan Didion: The Center Will Not Hold

I stumbled across this and the name Joan Didion rung a bell, but I didn't know exactly much about her. This documentary was a revelation to me and exposed me to this hugely talented woman. Throughout, we delve into an archive of her essays, novels, and screenplays - where Didion provides us with observations on her personal experiences and state of mind. Directed by her nephew, Griffin Dunne, The Center Will Not Hold explores a treasure trove of footage and spends time talking with Joan about her eventful life - from writing for Vogue to her life in California, the writing of her books and marriage to the writer, John Gregory Dunne. If you want to be inspired, this documentary does a great job of honoring Didion's impactful career in the world of literature and culture.

Living With Yourself

Paul Rudd plays Miles, fed up with his life, and on the brink of burn-out in work and his love life. Miles heads to a 'spa' where he is promised a new, improved version of himself. The procedure doesn't quite go to plan, and Miles ends up having to live with his clone whilst trying to maintain normality at work with his colleagues and at home with his wife. There are only about 8 episodes at about 30 minutes max so this is what you would call a 'binge' worthy series if you're that way inclined. I really enjoyed this series and found it both funny and entertaining. It was an interesting look at how we view the self, and the desire for self-improvement - a dark, satirical but weird and bizarre comedy - if you like Black Mirror, this will be right up your street.

Camino A Roma

Whilst on lockdown, I've been trying to learn as much about filmmaking as I can. If you've seen Roma by Alfonso Cuaron, then you may just be interested to see what goes into the production of the movie in this insightful documentary. I genuinely sometimes find behind-the-scenes features more interesting than the films themselves - I just love seeing the cameras, the actors, and production design, and everything that goes into making a film. We get to see how the director works on set, and lots of little details you wouldn't know from just watching the film. For example, a lot of the cast aren't experienced actors, the story is about Cuaron's childhood growing up and a lot of it is pure memory and not a lot of research. Fascinating and insightful, a must-watch for film buffs!

Bikram: Yogi, Guru, Predator

What stings the most about this documentary is the ending, where viewers are told that Bikram, the man, and focus of this whole documentary, is still teaching students today. Bikram rose to fame in the '70s for his 26-pose hot yoga classes and teacher training, which catapulted him to dizzying heights of success, wealth, and power. Not the first to do so, Bikram uses his status and abuses it, and throughout the documentary, former students reveal they were sexually abused by him. I found it both fascinating and scary how people, ie. the students, were so swept up by it all that his behavior was ignored, even tolerated. A man who lives in contradiction, promoting a peaceful and healthy lifestyle through yoga but his actions don't reflect those values.

Feminists: What Were They Thinking?

This documentary was really moving and emotional for me. Directed by Johanna Demetrakas, she revisits photos from a 1977 book capturing women shedding cultural restrictions. We meet the women from the book over 40 years later, such as Jane Fonda and Michelle Phillips (The Mamas & The Papas) who talk about what it was like growing up a feminist and their careers in the arts, music, acting, comedy, literature and more. Though the documentary is made over 40 years since the photographs were taken and assembled for the book, what I found so emotional is that women are still fighting the same fight today. Initially, I found it a little despairing but also motivating and inspiring to continue pushing for change and gender equality.

38 Days Later

38 Days Later

Spring blossoms on a daily walk!

38 is the number of days I've been at home now 'self-isolating'/on lockdown/quarantining - whatever you want to call it or 'confinement' as the French say. Also well done if you got the play on words! If you didn't, 28 Days Later is a post-apocalyptic horror film by Danny Boyle featuring the gooorge Cillian Murphy who wakes up in a hospital and goes outside to discover London is completely deserted -  I highly recommend.

My version, 38 Days Later, involves 0 actual zombies but the state of the supermarkets in the first couple of weeks wasn't far off looking like a set from the film though. Currently, outside my window cars are still driving by, people are out enjoying the sun, on their own though, I should add. However, normality feels like it could be in the hopefully not so distant future?

I've kept up the same attitude since my last post, enjoying the little things and mostly avoiding the news only when necessary. I tuned in for the most recent speech from Emmanuel Macron who then announced a further lockdown till the 11th of May. It's funny how I'd been going days without thinking about the news and the severity of the illness, and one speech put my mind in a negative space. The reality of what's going on hit me all over again like it was news I was hearing for the first time. Selfishly, I also noticed my 25th birthday will be spent at home.

To be honest, I didn't have plans yet but they most likely wouldn't have involved staying indoors but here we are! I like being home anyway and if staying in saves lives then I'm happy to do that. There'll be cake and I've booked time off work so it's shaping up alright for a 25th birthday.

Work has been keeping me busy. I've been researching new music and interviewing an Italian artist who's stuck in America for her quarantine. I find it fascinating how everyone's experience with this will be so unique. You can read the interview (in French) here if you like. It reminded me of how nice it was to talk to a stranger and share stories. It made me realize one of the things I've loved the most about my job is talking to people and asking questions (I like to do this in general so as a job it feels like a bonus).

Other things I've done include: painting my nails, cutting my own hair (it happened), watching documentaries, going for walks, playing my Nintendo, reading my book, making several quiches (some good, some epic failures) doing a 'Houseparty' app call with my cousins and doing two easter egg hunts in my flat and proceeding quickly to eat all of the chocolate. I've vacuumed several times and it actually helps calm my mind a lot so there's an obvious wellness tip for you if you ever needed one.

I've also got very into meditation, to the point where, if I'm feeling rubbish, my first thought now is 'I need to meditate'. If you'd told me a year ago, that meditation would be so beneficial if I just gave it a go, I would have made an excuse or said I'll just 'get round to it'. I've finally started making the effort and I couldn't imagine going without it.

38 days later and the start of all of this feels like a lifetime ago. I'm slightly apprehensive about when life goes 'back to normal' - how will it feel to be in a crowd again? On a crowded commute? I think in a weird way, there will be parts I miss about being at home. I especially like not having any FOMO (fear of missing out), but I realise that's on me, and not on others. I'm learning to enjoy going by my own schedule and timetable, and if being at home suits me more than going out, or if I simply can't then I'm learning to be at peace with that. I sometimes like working from home, having everything I need around me, and the ability to roll out of bed! It's great that once I 'clock off', I'm already home.

I like that I'm now making time to do things I would make excuses for before. I'm excited again to learn, to be creative, and to cook! Can you believe that I chopped a ton of veg and made my first ever homemade soup of... my life?!

I'm not sure who I'm writing this for exactly, or who will enjoy it, but mostly I'm writing this for my future self. When I'm an oldie, and hopefully still know how to find this part of the internet, I can look back at this and show it to family and say "This is what happened when I was in my 20's!". 

The Film Club #11

The Film Club #11

Well, it's not like any of us are getting out to a cinema any time soon. Most of the films I was looking forward to seeing this year (The French Dispatch, No Time to Die, Tenet...) have all been postponed so I guess we'll just have to make do with the wonderful films that are already available.

Whilst stuck at home post-wisdom teeth op, I caught up on some films in my spare time. Here are some films I recommend...

Parasite (2019) by Bong Joon-ho

Ok ok, this is obvious and barely necessary of a mention. Everyone has heard about Parasite by now, right? On the off chance you haven't heard of it, it's bloody brilliant and that's all you need to know. I rented it on Google Play after seeing a bazillion tweets/article headers about the movie and eventually caved, I couldn't wait any longer! I read no reviews so nothing was spoiled beforehand. I was truly gripped from the first frame and felt like I was constantly being revealed surprises throughout, whilst the characters couldn't quite believe what was unfolding in front of them, neither could I. On very basic terms, it's a social satirical masterpiece about class and greed, where a poor family cons their away into and quickly infests, like a parasite, the lives of a very rich family. I recommend these articles (1, 2, 3) and this video about the film (to consume after viewing to avoid spoilers!). Parasite marked a pivotal moment in cinematic history as it was the first EVER non-English language film to win the Academy Award for Best Picture in history. A must-see!

1917 (2019) by Sam Mendes

I mainly wanted to go and see this because I knew Roger Deakins was the cinematographer behind it all and that it was shot in one take - or made to look like it as much as possible anyway. What's also really great about this movie is that it was co-written by a woman, Krysty Wilson-Cairns. Director, Sam Mendes wanted to honor his grandfather, Alfred Mendes, in 1917, who was a native of Trinidad and a messenger for the British on the Western Front. Mendes said that "it's important to remember they were fighting for a free and unified Europe and it's good to be reminded of that now". 1917 felt particularly unique amongst other war movies, mostly thanks to the way it was filmed - as you follow the two lead characters on their journey from the very first scene to the last. The camera felt very up close and really there was no way of escaping what was going on in front of you. An intense and captivating perspective of the first world war.

Midsommar (2019) by Ari Aster

Something very different here, but equally as intense as 1917. I can't say I really enjoyed Midsommar, maybe the better word is endured. Though beautifully shot, interesting and with brilliant acting from lead Florence Pugh, it just left me feeling a little uneasy. It's a horror film but set in broad daylight which makes it all the more eery. No jump scares, darkness or ghosts here but a very different kind of horror film. A young couple embarks on a 'trip' to a midsummer festival in a remote Swedish village. It all starts off as a nice, carefree summer holiday and looks pretty idyllic, however it takes a sinister turn when the insular villagers invite the guests to take part in certain festivities. Think The Wicker Man but even more confusing.

The Lighthouse (2019) by Robert Eggers

Cabin fever might be beginning to feel a little too familiar for us all, right? Maybe save this one for when you're out of isolation, so you don't feel more claustrophobic. Two lighthouse keepers, played by Robert Pattinson and Willem Dafoe, are stuck out on a remote and mysterious island in New England in the 1890s. They both struggle to maintain their sanity as they are confined together day in and day out on this island. For four weeks, the men face back-breaking work in miserable conditions with no one else for company but each other. They must endure one another's odd quirks and behaviors, resentment and hatred. In the unfortunate weather conditions, the two are forced to spend more time in hunger, agony and manic isolation with nothing but booze and telling old tales to keep them entertained. Visually this movie is a gorgeous, gothic horror sensation all shot in black and white, adding to the soulless atmosphere on the island with mad but brilliant performances from both actors.

The Farewell (2019) by Lulu Wang

It's not uncommon in Chinese culture, for example, to keep a loved one in the dark about an illness, like in The Farewell. The film tells the story of a Chinese family, who discover that their Grandmother has only a short while left to live. In order to get all the family together for one last time, they decide to schedule an impromptu wedding for a reunion. We meet Billi, a Chinese American, who quickly gets on the next flight from her home in New York back to her home country of China when she learns the news. However, she struggles to fit in with her family again and is against her family's decision to hide the truth from her grandmother. I really loved this film and thought it was a beautiful story about messy and loving big families, cultures and what home means.

The Irishman (2019) by Martin Scorsese

Lastly, The Irishman! How lucky are we to have a director well into his seventies still making movies like this, and at such a length too. This movie is a crazy 3 hours and 30 minutes long but I'll be honest I didn't feel like I'd been watching it that long. I've watched shorter movies that felt longer but this one keeps you entertained with no need to check the time. In short, it's set in the 1950s where we meet truck driver, Frank Sheeran (played by longtime Scorsese companion, Robert De Niro). He quickly gets involved with the Pennysylvania crime family and then goes on to work for Jimmy Hoffa, an American labor union leader and president of the International Brotherhood of Teamsters and is largely tied to organized crime. These are exactly the kind of stories Scorsese does best but Casino is still up there as my all time favourite of them all, soz. What I did find interesting though was the use of special effects to make certain actors look younger - you can find out more about this in the 20/30 minute follow up episode 'In Conversation' featuring the director and lead actors from the movie on Netflix. It's amazing what we can do with technology in film, but for me it felt out of place. Nevertheless, it was as expected flawlessly performed, with amazing costume design (another interesting video here) with a great soundtrack too.

What movies have you been loving lately?

What's Going On?

What's Going On?

Thanks to Marvin Gaye for sponsoring this post. But in all seriousness, his song title did inspire me about the current state of everything at the moment, what is going on? And if you're interested, for work I created a playlist, including said song, specifically for quarantining which you can check out on Spotify here. Yes, I have too much time on my hands.

Since the beginning of the year, I've been busy. Mostly enjoying myself, working at another festival, had my purse stolen though, done back-to-back interviews with musicians, had all four wisdom teeth removed (damn I wish I timed that better for a quarantine) oh and yeah, I'm quarantining and working from home, because of a global pandemic virus (?!?). There's a sentence I never thought I would use.

Let's rewind over a week first. I was at work, I'm currently working here if you're interested. My time has been taken up writing and doing a lot for that lately hence why this place has taken a back seat. Anyway, so my colleague came and told me that I would be working from home because France was about to go on 'lockdown'. Sounds like the opening to an episode of Black Mirror, doesn't it?

Then everything just happened very quickly, like going through one of those flick books and everything goes by in a fast blur, too fast to gather your emotions. We were told all schools would be shut, then an announcement on the weekend said all restaurants/bars, etc would be closed, then another announcement later to say we were not to leave our homes for anything other than necessities. And breathe.

I read something online saying that, if you've got anxiety, you already make up so many catastrophic scenarios in your head that when something like this happens you may surprisingly feel calm because you're constantly prepared for the worst. Initially, I didn't feel calm, I felt worried and imbalanced. Though my emotions have been coming and going in waves, I've come to an acceptance of it all, and feel calmer. Even though I found out that Glastonbury, the first time I would ever have attended for the 50th anniversary, had been canceled, I just accepted it. My friend that had planned to come and visit me had to have her flights canceled but I accepted it...well I had no other choice but to accept. I've also stopped bombarding myself with news whilst at home which has helped my state of mind.

These were just two minor things on the scale of things being canceled and delayed but the major 'thing' is the illness, the major thing is people losing their lives, jobs, homes, potentially, because of it. So how do we possibly stay sane in situations like this?

Hopefully, I don't come off as 'preachy' but it's gratitude. It's the only thing helping me get through this and has been helping me with everything lately. I read that it is impossible to feel negative and positive emotions at the same time so I try to swap all my anxieties and fears with gratitude. In a time where it feels so uncertain and everything is up in the air, you have to be grateful for where you are right now in this second, what you have (no matter how small) and who you have in your life. 

I hope a lot of other people are seeing it this way too. When something is so massive, concerning massive populations and countries and quite literally puts the majority of the world 'on hold', I see it as more than just a virus. At least, I'm trying to turn this horrible event, experience into something positive which could feel like an impossible task. I'm naturally a very reflective, deep-thinker which is both a blessing and a curse so of course all this free time has got me thinking a whole load more.

If I can I take something, anything, positive from the situation, I think it's reinforced for me what is truly important more than ever, what I can go without and what is just 'stuff'. It's showing me the power of community and humanity. I'm realising how connected everyone is, regardless of borders and imaginary walls. I'm realising how valuable time is. I'm feeling inspired to be creative with no agenda. I'm enjoying filling my time with good books, art, music, and film. I've been doing dancing lessons in my flat with my roommate. I've been trying new recipes and reading books. I've been meditating. I'm enjoying pretty boring, simple things. I've surprisingly been laughing a lot. I'm astounded at my own, and others, strength when world catastrophes like this happen. I'm also astounded at the number of idiots who have chosen to hoard toilet paper!

I've tried to keep up with the news but had to reduce due to it making me feel powerless, guilty and negative. I've come somewhat to a conclusion about how this all relates to the planet, humans, climate change. However, I think it's up to you to make up your own mind about why this has all happened, without my influence. Whatever happens, I hope that this event gives you time to truly pause and reflect. I hope it brings you out the other side more grateful, more present. I sort of hope that we'll go a little slower, take a little more care, be more accepting, less greedy and not be in a rush to return to our usual ways, the kind of ways that will make something like this happen again in our future.

In other (less breaking) news, referring back to one of my last posts, I'm happy to say I achieved a 'small' goal of moving into my own flat (silver linings!). Not my 'own' home yet, but I'm getting there. The photos in this post were taken today on a walk. Luckily exercise during the quarantine is allowed, and so is staring at and taking photos of beautiful spring flowers. 

I realise this was probably just a jumble of thoughts and probably best not written at 10pm at night, but too late.

Lastly, I want to put out my gratitude to my home, family, friends, health workers, anyone working hard right now, also to musicians, artists, writers, filmmakers and activists who make my life and this world a better place.

The Film Club #10

The Film Club #10

I started this little series way back in 2016 as a place to share my love for films. It's been a while since my last so here are 6 films I have LOVED lately!

Uncut Gems (2019) 

by Josh & Benny Safdie

While this movie is still fresh in my mind, I feel compelled to talk about it, and tell everyone to watch it, (so I can talk about it with them too!). Adam Sandler was in his 50's before he finally got this perfect role offered to him and I guess you can say on this occasion that good does come to those who wait (a frigging long time!). Uncut Gems is the ultimate thriller-crime heist movie and is an adrenaline rush from start to finish. From the first moment of this film, it's like a time bomb is set, inevitably ticking towards a catastrophic ending. Sandler plays Howard Ratner, who runs a jewelry store in NYC's 'Diamond District' which I didn't know anything about until the film so it was a huge eye-opener for me, and I was completely gripped by the story. Sandler gives his all whilst playing one of the many ruthless, crazy, strung-out, addicted, mad-men who roam the Diamond District, and though he is a lying, cheating criminal, you can't help but sympathize with Howard and hope he'll make it out alive. You'll be literally on the edge of your seat as you watch him try to untangle himself from extremely sticky situations, one after the other, and as his career, family life, relationships and life hang by a very fine thread.

Marriage Story (2019)

by Noah Baumbach

Moving onto a completely different genre now, with Marriage Story by Noah Baumbach, the man behind Frances Ha and Mistress America. I've watched this twice now and don't get tired of it - the performances make the movie. It's a heartfelt and revealing look at the process of a couple going through a divorce with a child caught in the middle. The performances by Adam Driver and Scarlett Johansson never felt fake or exaggerated and to me felt like watching the real thing. It is filmed in such a way that you see well from both sides of the marriage breakdown and never root for one more than the other, sharing the different perspectives of going through such an experience. You see the way a couple who once loved one another, or still do, can be turned against each other in the brutal process of divorce by their lawyers (though I loved Laura Dern!) and just how damn complicated it is. I also loved the way set design was used in this film too and how Baumbach decided to use a different aspect ratio (1.66) therefore creating a more intimate portraiture of the family and focusing on the characters more than anything else.

The Intern (2015)

by Nancy Meyers

Rewinding back a few years for this one with The Intern which came out in 2015 but is available now on Netflix. Not your usual Robert De Niro movie and it probably won't become a cult movie classic or anything but it's a perfect pick-me-up, slightly cheesy and fun movie. De Niro plays Ben who is a 70-year-old widower, who is not quite ready to retire just yet and feels he still has something to give. He conveniently notices a poster by a young fashion company looking for senior interns and jumps at the chance. Jules, the CEO, is initially skeptical but a close friendship soon blossoms between the two as Ben proves himself to be sort of the missing piece in the puzzle in Jules life. There are lots of nice pockets of wisdom and life lessons throughout and is a proper feel-good movie!

Joker (2019)

by Todd Phillips

In complete contrast to The Intern, Joker is far from a feel-good movie, but I still loved it. It's been sweeping up awards and nominations just about everywhere so I doubt this mention is necessary. Then again if you are one of the 5 people who haven't heard about this Todd Phillips adaptation of the classic, Joker, then maybe this mini-review may, or may not, convince you to see it. Joaquin plays Arthur, a severely mentally ill and lonely man who is a failed comedian and works as a clown as his day job. After constant bullying, isolation, and rejection, he basically says f*ck it and all hell breaks loose in Gotham City as he transforms into the famous criminal Joker. I'll be honest, the movie was dark, grim and painful to watch, and I struggle to find a positive word to describe it. Of course, I loved it, so it's not a bad movie, by all means, it's just not for the faint-hearted, or if you're wanting to watch something fun or uplifting, then probably pick a different movie!

Deliverance (1972)

by John Boorman

Going a lot further back into the archive of movies, I finally watched Deliverance from 1972, which I'd been recommended for a long time. I had no idea what to expect really and seem to enjoy seeing movies this way more. A group of friends set off on what was supposed to be a fun weekend away of camping and canoeing then everything that can go wrong, goes wrong, as Murphy's law would have it. I felt like it reminded me a bit of The Hangover, a similarly optimistic group of guys who leave for a weekend trip away which very quickly escalates into a bit of a nightmare. Deliverance doesn't quite deliver (oops, pun unintended) on the comedy side of things like Hangover does, as the tone of the movie just feels a bit 'off' from the get-go (dueling banjos anyone?). All the performances are excellent, and you really do feel the same sense of panic of the characters as they find themselves in a grave situation. Some make it home in one piece, albeit permanently traumatized from a weekend they'd rather forget.

The Edge of Seventeen (2016)

by Kelly Fremon Craig

Ending on a happier-ish note with one of my favourite teen, coming-of-age comedies to date. I watched this for the second time recently and just love it. Hailee Steinfield (love!) plays Nadine, the awkward, goofy and hilarious high school student who's already quite 'upside down' life is turned further upside down when her older brother begins dating her best, and only, friend. She reacts in the most extreme way causing destruction wherever she goes, in her relationships, her family life and with her teacher, played by Woody Harrelson. What sets this movie apart from other coming-of-age movies with similar clichés is that the arc in Nadine's character is not necessarily about running away from everything and starting over, but accepting the life she has and the people in it, as awkward, confused and complex as she is, and realizing that actually, everything isn't as terrible as she makes it out to be. 

Little Women, Big Dreams

Little Women, Big Dreams

*contains some spoilers*

In this 2019 adaptation of Little Women, based on the 19th century novel by Louisa May Alcott, Greta Gerwig - actress-turned-director/screenwriter - explores the themes of women, money, ambition and art; a story which feels just as relevant today as it did all those years ago.

During the opening scene, as the ambitious Jo, played by the delightful (and now Oscar-nominated) Saoirse Ronan, runs excitedly through the streets of New York after selling a story to the local newspaper, it reminds you of Gerwig herself when she played a similar role as a young, aspiring dancer in the 2012 film Frances Ha. However, this time Gerwig is no longer the young women chasing her dreams, but living them out instead and proving herself as a filmmaker to be reckoned with. This is her latest work since her Oscar-winning and highly-acclaimed Ladybird, and she is now undoubtedly paving the way for women in the film-industry today.

From the interview with Edith Bowman for her Soundtracking podcast, Gerwig mentions a particular line in the book which resonated with her, that line being ‘the world is hard on ambitious girls’. In the film she successfully portrays the four sisters - Jo, Amy, Beth and Meg - as best friends and equally strong individuals in pursuit of their dreams in a tough world. The film’s timeline shows them playing and growing together, and striving for achievement, wealth or creative careers. As the young women mature, Gerwig successfully highlights each of the sisters’ different and individual paths whilst confronting life’s hard knocks along the way. Jo desires to be a successful writer; Amy (played by Oscar-nominated Florence Pugh) a painter in Paris; Beth (Eliza Scanlen), quiet but present, is a talented pianist but suffering from illness and Meg (Emma Watson), desires a wealthier lifestyle, a husband and a family. 

Though their visions on life differ and sometimes conflict, the bond of sisterhood and family never loosens the deep-rooted ties these girls have - whether through betrayal or loss. All girls are equally as expressive and creative, sometimes putting on small plays for children, helping around the house as they live at home with their mother, played by Laura Dern, who keeps things together despite the long absence of their father. They always find ways to keep themselves entertained and despite their own poverty, give to others with even less than themselves. What Gerwig portays so well is four young girls, and sisters, who have been raised well but have simultaneously carved out their own strong characters and direction in life. Equally she shows the obstacles often faced by young women who want a career of their own, but don't want to be lonely, who want wealth but don't know how to get it from a position of poverty or without a man's help, who don't want to get married even when society says you should and who, as Amy once puts it 'wants to be great or nothing at all'. 

The everyday lives of the girls and their motives are slightly shaken with the encounter of their charming and handsome neighbour Laurie, played by Timothée Chalamet, who peaks the interest of a few of the girls, a bit like the arrival of the wounded soldier in Sofia Coppola's, The Beguiled. He provides a new amusement and discovery for the girls who are yet to have their first experience in love. At one point, Beth even admits to 'being afraid of boys'. Sparks fly and jealousy then leads to betrayal, and in one scene Amy heartbreakingly burn's Jo's story out of jealousy. Though love interests cause friction between the girls, the sisterhood remains more important than anything. Jo who is essentially the leader of the pack, doesn't want to let any man stop her from following her dreams, even if that man loves her, or even when another man doesn't approve of her writing. Though careers, dreams and love gets in the way, family definitely comes first, and everything else second.

Gerwig succeeds in directing and telling a beautiful story about strong, determined little women with big dreams, fueled with happy and uplifting moments and with heartbreaking scenes too, mostly all of them which you will probably cry at. The performances are excellent and feel effortless and it is a movie that I will jump at the chance to see again and I highly recommend you go and see too, to support women film directors. I'm pretty disappointed that Gerwig received no director nominations, as I believe this is her best work yet and I'm so excited for her to create more films in the future. 

Disclaimer: I read no other reviews of this film before writing this and have never seen the other adaptations or read the original book (but I intend to asap!), so all words are my own - except quotes. The only research done was of course seeing the film and listening to the Gerwig/Bowman podcast on Soundtracking (listen here). Oh and big shout out to my mum the sub editor, lol.

A Door Of One's Own

A Door Of One's Own

"To have a door that I could shut was still the height of bliss for me."

For my first book of 2020, I'm currently reading Simone de Beauvoir's The Prime of Life (La Force de l'âge) the second volume of her autobiography. I loved the first volume and the many pockets of wisdom she shares about her upbringing then student-to-adult life in Paris. She's so witty and has a great sense of humour and as my first time reading anything by her, I'm already a big fan. There are many lines from her books that resonate with me and this one in particular stood out for me today. I've been thinking a lot about how much I'd love a home of my own. 

Throughout my life I've often shared homes, sometimes even a bunk-bed with my big sister when I was a child then much later sharing halls as a student and then a shared apartment as a young adult. I remember in my second home in Scotland my parents renovated the small room into a bedroom for me, finally a room of my own! Funnily enough, I didn't have a door on it whilst renovations were happening, instead it was a cheap pink beaded curtain until a door was put in place.

De Beauvoir talks about freedom and how intoxicating it was to possess it when she returned to live in Paris in 1929 and how she'd longed for this feeling as a young girl, dreaming about being a grown-up. When I moved back in with my parents after a year of job-hunting post-university, I felt I lost that sense of freedom, or independence that I guess I kind of took for granted. I didn't realise how crucial it was to my life. The ability to come and go as I pleased, bring friends round whenever I liked and do everything on my own timetable. However at the time it felt right, to have the comfort and support of a real 'home' and not rented accommodation. It was what I needed in that moment. Reading this line from the book provided a little reassurance and instilled some patience about having my own home one day. De Beauvoir rented off of her gran in Paris, wasn't hugely wealthy, but for her, freedom was the most valuable thing. She was utterly content with a small room, which was her little haven in a crazy metropolis, a place to briefly shut the outside world out and be herself.

I think it's been playing on my mind lately as I'm at an age where some of my friends, or old friends, are getting their own homes, getting engaged and even having kids already. And the other half are working out life, living at home and/or renting. I'm currently renting a room in someone else's home while I work, and the house is gorgeous, spacious and homely so I'm lucky. However, I'm longing for that 'I'm home, in my own home' feeling. I got a small taste of having my own flat for a few months last year, and I suppose I miss it a bit! It had it's pros and cons. Though it could be a tad lonely, I loved the freedom, I loved that everything was mine, and I could wander around in my pyjamas or do the famous dash from bathroom/bedroom (lol), and invite friends round as I pleased.

As Simone de Beauvoir says in her book, after reading a story in Mon Journal about an English schoolgirl, she says "Here, within these gaily painted walls, she read and worked and drank tea, with no one watching her -- how envious I felt!". I guess you could call it privilege, to have your own home to do that, not everyone has that. Though I may not have a home of my own yet, I try to make anywhere I go, rent or wherever I lay my head feel more like 'home'. And as long as I have a door to shut (or a pink beaded curtain to parade through!), then I can feel the feeling briefly of having my own home, and that's good enough for now.